5.30.2008

Tag by Niksu

Currently - boredom, wedding bells
Playing - Lost Without You - Delta Goodrem
Pending - Bath..
What's new? - My bday is comin?
Real name - Zainal Afnan
Nickname - Zain, Nal, ain, affy, nan
Married - 16 years from now
Male/Female - male
High school - SMDU
College - UiTM SARAWAK
Are you a health freak? - nope
Do you have a crush on someone? - no. im finding the person i kissed dlm mimpi!
Do you like yourself? - hm, YEAH

First,

Surgery - jahitan di tanganku.
Person you see in the morning - family.
Award - ntah. x ingat
Sports you join in - lumba lari.
Vacation - hahaha, siam?
Concert - 911
Drink - Air Suam
I'm about to - mandiiii

Your future,

Want kids - yes, 6 :D
Want to get married - yes
Careers in mind - Creative Director

Which is better?

Lips or Eyes? - Eyes
Hugs or Kisses? - BOTH
Shorter or Taller? - taller
Romantic or Spontaneous? - dua2
Sensitive or Loud? - LOUD
Troublemaker or Hesitant? - none.

Have you ever,

Kissed a stranger? - no...
Drank bubbles - penah kot!
Lost glasses / contacts - kotak glasses ye lah. br hilang! dayumn!
Ran away from home - tried to
Liked someone younger - tried to
Broke someone's heart - yeah.
Been arrested - hampir??
Cried when someone died - yes

Do you believe in: Yourself - yes. Miracles - yes. Magic - yes. Angels - yes

Answer truthfully: Is there someone you want to be with right now? - ntah?

Photos Baby, Now You Get!

you will get to view it soon.

5.28.2008

Upper East Side, Yo!

ah, i forgot to mention about me and my friends creating a nickname for ourself from the character of gossip girl drama/book. :) hahaa... it is so funny and we called ourself Upper East Side kids, the 'It' people and socialite.. hahaha well, the nickname goes..

Serena van der Woodsen- Dot
Dan Humphrey - me
Blair Waldorf - Eena
Nathaniel Archibald - Jazli
Chuck Bass - Jiji
Erik van der Woodsen - Jojo

hahaa.. funny rite..? :P

stay tune for more story of the upper east side kids..

amin,

xoxo (you know you love me, HAHAHHAHAHHAAHHAHAHHAHAHA)

Touch My Body, Diet!

Kinda funny right the title of my post today? well, i know. it is because of the people around me tend to get diet, slim and fit and even myself wanna get slim. it is because you cant tahan tengok others with their gorgeous body. yeah, guys also need a slim and fit body to get girls go over them, but im not into getting girls to look at me.. c'mon.. i just have to get slim cause ive been fat since form 4.. i need to get back to how do i look before.. a kurus guy :D yey! no fat. no worries. haha.. imean, its cool to be kurus and fit, can wear any baju and seluar.. not like me.. bila dah gemok i cant find good clothes for myself even a jeans. ah. that's so frustrating.. yea i know it could be bad for kids to look at but hey, i dont like being fat eventho some people said im not fat, well, I AM FAT! that is the fact! Jiar's mum said, "just stay like that, you look better now.." hahahaa. no comment. and my aunt, mak bayah said, "you r not fat, just chubby.." i said, if i dont eat rice then i'll be slim. yeah.. im cutting rice from my daily food portion of eating.. food pyramid they say.. hehe

I already cut eating rice, junk food(only when im travelling), chocolate, ice cream(less eating day by day).. im happy for that! hehe

the people around me who wanna get slim and fit ; my sis, my cousin (kak zetty), my bestfriends - eena n dot.. hehe..

let's get slim and then, people can touch our body like its hot like pancake! :P

i like Be Mine by Robyn.. so cool lah!

Amin,

xoxo.

5.26.2008

Seribu Tahun

Hi..

I guess i have many things to say and to write it down is one of the important for me. Things I should have said early, perhaps gonna change to what people think about me. I have been so much about myself today. Really, I think about myself and I already figure out what I wanna be and what I wanna do. I will talk about things I wanna say one by one so you won’t get confuse or weird about it.

Myself

I figure that people, the close people around me have always force me to do something that I wouldn’t do or be. Its like you are forcing one to be in the situation they don’t want to be. Like me, my brother, he always wants me to work in the government, which I refuse so to do when im graduating my diploma and degree.. soon. But hey, come on, I know working in the government is a good think but I don’t want to end up being someone who doesn’t have any ambition. I want to be a writer, a fashion editor/writer one day, that is what I wanna be and do for my living. I know, I study public admin, but that doesn’t mean I have to work in the civil service right? I kinda like things going to it flow but sometimes you gotta figure what you wanna do for life, right? Its kinda odd when people talk to me and say, why don’t you work as a diplomat or minister since you already in the field of study. I say, no. I like travelling but sometimes we have to get back to reality which I know, what my family is having now, a ***** crisis. I tried not to show to people about what is my family facing right now because I think my family is a reserved people than I wanna get people to know about it. enough about that.

Well, get back to me aight, I really think that people see me as a rich kid, which I am not. Most of my UiTM friends think im such a high profile person, which again, im not cause im a people’s person. I like being in the low profile way which is good and better for me. On the other hand, I still don’t understand why people think im perfect. Hey, I don’t own a perfect life, you know? I only own a simple, infamous way of living. I know I work as a fashion journalist make people think that way, I don’t even a style! C’mon, see me as someone that normal as same as you guys. i asked few of my friends about how they think of me when they first see me, they said that my face is kind of arrogant face. I just laugh to that because I do think myself of the things they said but I just can't help if people think that way. Oh, I still don’t understand why people like to copy my way of dressing to class.. hahaa.. laugh about that will you? Imean, I just wear shirts, jeans and my converse shoe to class, but still people wanna follow what im wearing, weird huh? My friends said im a trendsetter in UiTM, hahaha but hell no. im not! I don’t understand when I bought new shirts, shoe or anything, people at UiTM will also get the same things. Aiya.. I still cant figure out why. Ah, another story is.. people think I have hilarious life, like going to party’s, attend fashion soiree or get freebies. Hey, that’s a part of my job ok? I go to party like birthday party? Haha.. I know I do club but I don’t go to the place as much as I love to because most of my friends imean, best friends are not the clubber people. I do have clique the one who goes to club most of the weeks but they are drinking and im not, so its hard for me to join them.

Life is not hilarious when you get into the situation you don’t want to be like me. Sometimes you gotta pretend even if the things you want you can’t get and probably you gotta understand why it happened like that. I do understand about the things I cant have and I guess im fine with it. I know what am I capable of doing and not doing so I will just be myself, be comfortable in your own skin and try not to be others but yourself.


Relationship

I guess, its time where I should speak out about it cause things got worse lately. I have finally get over her, mia. And I think it’s a good way of me forgetting her cause I know she is happy with someone she loves and do things together. I hope the best for her. Every time I try to get into a relationship, it wouldn’t work out as I hope, the reason, there’s a third party. With every girls I flirt or wanna be with, she surely will have boyfriend or someone in mind. I don’t blame them for that, but sometimes, I wonder why I cant get a good relationship that I wish for. Susah sangat ke to have it? I know jodoh and all is in the god’s hand but sometimes we human must also search for it, am I right? But for now, im done with hoping, expecting, searching, waiting or whatever. Its just wasting of time for me. Being single for almost 8 months is fine. Like a friend of mine said, “single life rocks but we sure want to have someone by our side and its lonely, I know,” I agreed to what she said. Im not desperate to have a girlfriend but im tired of answering to people question such as, ‘mana gf’, ‘bila nak show us your girl’ ‘ah ko sombong tanak tayang awek’, what can I say about it? I don’t have a perfect answer for it. when I know a girl, I will treasure her and when I think I should forget her because of her having someone else, I will completely forget about her, all abt her, what she like and stuff. I think that way is much better for me to be myself, I cant be friend anymore with girls who broke my heart or suddenly tell me, ‘you’re going to have someone better than I do.’ It’s the way im handling people who involve in my life.

Like the girl I used to get really close to, mia, I do like and love her but things between me n her, didn’t happened. The matter came worse when we got into a conversation fight where she thought I was having someone in mind, which I don’t. So, from there, I clearly know and notice that she’s meeting someone, her dream guy so there it goes. So, perfectly, I and she have nothing anymore. I have deleted her from myspace and I said something to her before I deleted her, I said things that I hope for her. And that’s what I have already done. I don’t have to think about anyone right now. It’s good not to have someone anymore. I thought I found myself in her, but she does really change me.

I can’t help of what im feeling now – lonely but I guess time will heal the pain im having now. Hehe. Don’t get too close to someone you think she or he might be the best for you, just know them first alright? Then, you won’t get hurt so much.

Friendship

Im pretty happy with the friends I get to but sometimes I feel I didn’t get the attention from them so much it makes me feel sad, I know they all busy with their things but cant I have some moment with them. I find sometimes, I don’t know who should I turn to and talk to about things I wanna say.. its hard being me. I like having friends that you can turn to and talk about things. I feel like im a character in the gossip girl – Nathaniel or best known as Nate. He perfectly doesn’t have the friend that he wants to tell his problem and all and that’s what happened to me. I need friend I can be with not asking your 24/7 hours but please do make a time for me.

And I don’t know why I don’t have friends to lepak anymore except for the horny, gfs. Imean, I do think im not in the circle of friends anymore with my bu4 friends.. I do think that they ditched me, but why? What did I do so wrong till you want to ditch me. Im tired of seeing same faces but I think its okay to have the same faces around you cause you know they are the one who you can talk to when you are bored. :P haha.. I want to be the circle of friends who gets me and understand me and do not think of what I am but for myself. Understand me?

I think this what been longing in my head and its good to speak it out before my head going crazy.

The best solution to solve your problem is speak out and listen to good music.

amazing thing i did today, i cooked my dinner. :) haha corn beef n egg :P

Amin,

xoxo

5.23.2008

Carnival

Aha, you forget her, and its good and you're getting sicker day by day. Thats me, im sick now. :) hehe.. its not because of buatan orang or what. anyway, sometimes in life, we gotta lose things we love so much in letting others be happy for their future, we gotta lose friendship to make one be happy for herself. :) right? kalau tidak, kita sendiri akan merana right?? im tired of being such a loser or jerk so its better for me to step aside and be single and happy altho everyday i felt the pain in my heart, i do know the fact that im not gonna live longer, so i just be happy with everyone i love, my best friends, cousins, family and my soon to be niece/nephew. :) i cudnt wait for the baby to come out!! im gonna be the coolest uncle ever.

sometimes, you gotta forget and be happy, forget all the misery, all the single hood problem, "dont worry, you will get one soon," they said. i said, naah, i wont wait or put on hope anymore, i will just keep and lock my heart, :) and for the fact, im happy being single, cause dapat usha hot people and i can be myself with anyone i meeting. :)

what i learn so far in life is,
just be happy and don't wait or hope but pray to God.

Amin,

xoxo

5.21.2008

Ku rindu

Biarpun wajahmu kurindu,
ingatanku terhadapamu,
pasti berlalu,
akan terhapus jua saat itu,

walaupun wajahmu sering kurindu-rindukan,
sudah ku buang semua cerita dirimu,
bersama aku kini tinggallah memori,
yang membenakkan didada ini,

semestinya aku meninggalkan dirimu,
ku lupakan semua yang berlaku,
agar dapat ku jalani hari-hari dengan indah,
tanpa gusar dihati ini,

walaupun akan sunyi tanpamu,
namun ku redha,
inilah jalan pilihanmu dan diriku,
tiada yang ku paksa,

pergilah sayang,
pergilah rindu,
pergilah cintaku,
pergilah segalanya tentang kamu..

tetap akan ku rindu.. semuanya.

5.19.2008

izinkanku pergi

Assalamualaikum & hello.

yeaho. i wanna talk about friends. friends is someone you can turn to whenever you have problems.. i just love my friends for whom they are.. they are just wonderful friends around me all these years, and i wanna name the people here..

5 horny people;
eena,dot,jaz,ji,jo

3 lovable girls;
jiar,kiki,tati

uitm;
shzwn,hafiz,umar,isam,habib,daus,fatin,nadia,nadiah,bam,fiki,ash,oshin

and my durians frens;
aqi,mint,aida,amir,shafiqb

i just love them to bits..

I hope our friendship will be forever and ever.. love you all.

Will update photos later when i received the pics from dot.

Amin,

xoxo

i wanna erase you, dear love

Assalamualaikum & halo,

it was jiji & jojo bday. i attend their party, it was a get together with all my damansara friends, it was good. to see the people.. with their changing life and all. i still wanna catch with them up. maybe later after this i gotta meet them back, i chit chat with them and all. :) was really happy to see them, really i do. and happy birthday to my dear cousins, Jojo & Jiji, hope you will have wonderful life ahead you. :)

anyway, lets get back to the topic as shown in the title.. read properly kay kawan2.

is it possible for me to forget her? to erase her off my mind and heart..?

what is the used of living anymore to not think about her anymore?

and thats why im still single. i wanna erase her. erase her. everytime i think of her, i'd cried myself out. with the background songs of tanpa by 6ixth sense making it more drama to my life.. i just dont want to be in this life anymore. i wanna be with someone who will love me back and i will love her with all my heart. if that possible, no? if you were in my place, what would you do? the same thing right?

i hope, i can erase you from my life even if you said we're still gonna be friends, for me, honestly, i cant be friends anymore with the person i used to like and love. I will feel weird.. do u feel the same thing? even if i was the one who said we'll still be friends, i cant keep the words i said cause im not the person who keep his words after being hurt. i just wanna be free.

please, can i erase you from my mind, heart and life?

i wanna lie down to the grass and say, i'd love you and i wanna erase you. i was about to make you mine and you were with someone who you love more than me..

its okay. i just hope you will be happy with him. just be hapy and forget me too! please, will you? oh i sound like emo geek. yeah im a emo geek guy. i dont easily fall in love and its hard for me to. to leave you, but i have to.
people, im gonna go and make myself busy so you must help me forget this her. can you? make me happy, people. i wanna go have drinks with you, people.

gone with the wind..

Amin,

xoxo

5.17.2008

Sejiwa

Assalamualaikum,

Haha, im happy for my friend presence in my life. they're the bomb to me. i like like like this songs - buronan cinta by the lima and aku lebih tahu by mila. pls go dload them, it is a good music. i never lie abt good music. i bought new spec, ala2 clark kent tu. :) haha.

I thank her, mia, for letting me into her life and thanks everyone who let me be in their life. i wont forget you even i die tmr. haha. oh no, dont worry, i dont have any disease that let me die now yet. haha, but i guess i know whats coming up for me.

well, there better be good things. im going to kedah, sg petani tmr to attend my dad's bestfriend daughter wedding. :) arghh. i dont wanna go but anyway gotta go lah. i hope i will enjoy the wedding though. i wanna smoke with my frens lah. i missed them like fuck. pls, i wanna club with them. lemme pls pls.

hehe, okay. anyway people take good care of yourself okay all? better be good.

im off.

Amin,

xoxo

5.16.2008

Tanpa

i found the video clip of Tanpa through youtube. well, here is the video, this is the indonesian market video for tirta which is the same band of 6ixth sense, they have to change their name in indonesia cause theres a band also called 6ixth sense there.. hehe..



and this is the malaysian version..



and i love both of the video, suit them.. plus their song is just great. love love.

Amin.

xoxo

Hurt? or Happy?

Im amazed by the act from the girls that i knew. i knew rejection will be my resort, i tried not to fall again in love, but every time i tried to run, it keep coming back to me.. well, i already forget my heart for mia, she will always be in my heart no matter what, i hope she will be happy with her new beau.. lucky i didnt say a word of love or wink-winks to mardiha, and im not that hurtful with her, i understand, im her junior btw, so theres no chance and a big no-no, kan?

I was almost ter- fall for nadiah, my good friend in class and uni, i said to her that i sayang her more than a friend, she just said, thank you and appreciated it.. and take me as im her bestfriend.
:) oh girl, im just too good to be a girl bestfriend, am i? im such a loser and unlucky in love.. naah..
hehe, see, im just "good" to be their bestie. im not a boyfriend type, im a big no-no to be their bf.

I can see why, im a loser guy, im such an annoying person, not handsome, not stylo, not smart, no clever, not rich, not lovable type, not tall, not skinny or fit, im fat..

most of all, im nothing, not perfect to be theirs.. and im not from the good course la kan?

i will stay single from now on till next sem, next next sem.. even if i got one.. i'll just reject.

im not fit to have one.

so, im just gonna wait in the line..... hehe.. :)

I love this brand new song by 6ixth sense - tanpa.. its a great ballad.. i hope you know.. and listen to it. enjoy k? i gotta work tmr! c ya

TANPA
resah yang ku
ubah dalam kata
melukiskan kesunyian
tanpa engkau aku tak mengerti

meski
pagi itu menatapi
akan sunyi tanpamu
menemani aku sepi

tanpa..
cintamu aku resah
tanpa..
kasihmu aku hampa
tanpa..
dirimu aku nanti
hooo…

Kini benar-benarku rasakan
dalam benuk hatiku tanpamu
aku tak mengerti
takut
takut jauh cari dirimu
kan kau tinggalkan aku sendiri
tanpamu ku mati
hooo…

resah yang ku
ubah dalam kata
melukiskan kesunyian
tanpa engkau aku tak mengerti